The Official Kirby Cafe Wants You To Eat “Waddle Dee’s Fried Balls”

Kirby is seen inhaling a bunch of mouthless Waddle Dees.

Picture: Nintendo / Kotaku

Among the various delicacies offered to Kirby Cafe places in Japan, the one that really stands out is a side known as “Waddle Dee’s fried balls”. Instead of making a joke, I’m just going to let this one sit with you for a while.

Nintendo opened the first Kirby Café in Osaka, Japan in 2016, and since then various locations have opened and closed according to corporate whims and pandemic complications. I haven’t kept up with menu changes over the years, but seeing a fantastic “deez nuts” joke on Twitter this morning (remember, I’m only 12), I couldn’t help but dig.

As far as I can tell, it’s a real dish that’s been offered in Kirby Café restaurants since late 2019, and as the picture shows, the menu calls it “Waddle Dee’s fried balls” in English. But an exact translation, according to Kirby wikiis the much more innocent “Waddle Dee’s Lightly Hand-Rolled Pikora”.

Also, the menu description says they’re made from little orbs of pizza dough rather than, you know, junk food from a video game character, which is kind of a relief. Waddle Dee’s fried dumplings also come with Cajun spices and maple syrup for dipping, if desired.

The lingering question, at least in my mind, is why they’re even called Waddle Dee’s Fried Balls in the first place.

Kirby Café, the story goes, was created when Kirby and a bunch of Waddle Dees decided to open a restaurant. Of course, as a bunch of little idiots, they couldn’t cook anything, so they enlisted frequently Kirby Chef Kawasaki series foe to make food. The Waddle Dees help roll pizza dough, but that’s no reason to name the whole dish after them.

Read more: Go bite-sized in the real world Kirby Car Cake

My best guess is that the division of labor looks like this: Chef Kawasaki cooks all the meals, Waddle Dees hauls all the supplies, and Kirby just hangs out and takes orders occasionally while eating whatever he wants from his name is on the building. This chef’s hat is just for show, apparently, but Kirby is so cute (and powerful) let everyone let him do what he wants.

Anyway, I just spent 378 words explaining this whole Kirby Café thing because I think the word “balls” is inherently funny. I hope you got something out of it, because I did.

Comments are closed.